Ugh.

I was told that one day life wouldn't be so painful but I tend to watch it go downhill more and more every minute. Is there ever going to be peace for me? I'm either hurting someone or someones hurting me... I can't say I miss the days when I was a kid and nothing matter because I grew up way to fast for me to even think. Young was when I should only be crying because I scraped my knee trying to ride a two wheeler. I've had the odd good day or two but there's always some sort of argument....and lies, big lies. Nothing is ever short and sweet with me. White lies turn into long and draged out tradgities for me.... I've hurt the most caring people in my life... I might as well have killed them...they might as well kill me.. Commit crime of passion? Commit to living in lies? Commit to telling all of the truths? My life is almost on big lie...for attention? I have to admit something...and only one person knows the actual truth... but I think someone else deserves it too.... it will make him actually hate me, I'm sure of it.. but I'm tired of telling a story that was never really true... Will you ever forgive me?